Thursday, October 16, 2008

Two good ones

Here's a couple of good ones from the Evangelism Conference this past week at Southeastern Seminary.

From Junior Hill:

A nutritionist was at a nursing home talking to the residents about healthy eating habits. She said, "Now don't eat much pork because it can give you high blood pressure. And don't eat too many eggs, because they can raise your cholesterol. And there's one food you should never eat because it will cause trouble for you the rest of your life. Does anyone know what that food is?"

An old man at the back of the room sat up in his chair, "I can tell you what it is. Wedding cake."

From Jerry Vines:

A fellow had a rough marriage all his life, and he died and went to heaven. When he got to the gate, Peter told him he would have to spell the password to get in.

"What's the password," the fellow asked.

"Love," said Peter.

"L-O-V-E," said the fellow, and the gates opened and let him into Paradise.

A few months later, the fellow was enjoying Paradise when he was asked to fill in for Peter at the gate while he took care of some errands. As the fellow stood there and people were lined up to come in, suddenly he was shocked to see his wife of many years.

"Well, honey, I didn't expect to see you so soon," the fellow said.

"Well darling, I just missed you so much, that I just decided to give up and come on up here and be with you," the wife said. "What do I have to do to get in?"

"Oh, just spell the password," the husband said.

"What is it?" the wife asked.

"Czechoslovakia," the fellow said.